The last few months have seen me go from being a confident business person, struggling with a new project to a bankrupt - losing everything that I had. Fortunately, that was not a lot more than a huge pile of bank debt! No one can take away my spirit, passion, motivation desire or my experiences.
If I'm honest the only real thing that has gone - is the debt! OK so my credit rating has taken a bashing, but already I have been offered a credit card and a new bank account. Yes the interest rate is a little higher ... who cares ... I'm not in the market for credit or a bank account at this time anyway.
One of the huge benefits is that the stress and worry of having a growing debt around ones neck, suddenly disappears. Yes, I had to go to court, but the judge did not even see me - he just signed the application. Yes, I had to speak with the Official Receiver, but we did that on the phone, and the person I spoke with was most understanding and made me feel as relaxed as he could under the circumstances.
As a result of the bankruptcy I have relinquished all my directorships, closed both of my companies down, had a huge clear out of stuff accumulated over the last twenty years or so, shredded all those bank and credit card statements and now my office at home looks much tidier than before and I feel a lot more content and relaxed. The house is getting decorated. The garden is getting some attention. Even the environment is better off as I am not burning tankfuls of petrol each month!
Of course the important thing is to learn from the whole episode. What did I do wrong? How had I got myself into that mess? What must I do to avoid such a thing again? What shall I do next?
I have pondered over this for the last few months. Well my first problem was how to tell other people that I was a failure! What would they think of me? Would anyone listen to me ever again? Even one of my daughters suggested that I get a job and be thankful for the little house I live in (it has a low rent) and be grateful that I am in good health ... and STOP dreaming about being rich and successful again! Is she right?
Well all these things transverse through my head. I decided to look for a new job and found one quite quickly. More by luck than anything else. But I discovered that my new employer did not have an office for me - I would have to share with him. They had no computer for me to use, or a telephone, mobile or even a decent chair. Then I discovered that they had no money to invest in the project. To top it all, they were not willing to listen to me when I tried to highlight the issues that were standing in our way.
For the first time in my life, I politely (well that's my explanation) told them where they could stick their job ... and went home, never to return. Hey! I'd learnt something from going bankrupt ... how to identify when things are not right!
Since then I sat down and decided (whilst my mind was confused) that I just wanted a really simple job that I could leave behind at 5pm when I went home. Driving a delivery van, stacking shelves, even sweeping roads or cutting grass! That is what I wanted to do! After all, I'm 58 and in just seven years I will retire and someone else can look after me!
Then something happened! I logged onto my computer today to check my emails. I found an invitation to connect on Plaxo to an old friend Reg Athwal (http://www.regathwal.com/) who I had known for a number of years but had not spoken too for some time. I accepted his invitation and as an after though visited his website to see what he was up to these days. I clicked on a couple of links and eventually watched a long video recording of Reg presenting at the India Retail Forum 2007 in Mumbai.
His words immediately touched me. I started to get excited about what he was saying. My mind went back to the past and all the things I had heard, said and believed in! Suddenly I realised that I was not being fair to myself. I had been pushed into a corner and was accepting my lot as if I was a two year old. This was not me. I'm Jim Tuffin, I'm passionate about a whole host of things ... that passion has not gone away however much I'm trying to convince myself it has.
So here I am. Bankrupt! No money! Feeling bad about myself! Getting older by the day! Hopeless! Helpless!
BUT ... I'm alive and I have passions and dreams!
I contacted Reg Athwal to thank him for inspiring me again. He responded and gave me some great advice…
“Keep sharing your dream with people and your dream team will come together, but put the past in the past and let it go now, the present is all that matters!”
Sometimes it has to be spelt out to you. Sometimes you need to be taken and given a good shaking. Sometimes you’ll even get the message.
I’ve got the message Reg! The past is in the past. The lessons have been learnt and recorded. The present is what matters now … and that is what I am focusing on from this moment forward.
If you would like to work with me ... if you want to share your passion with me ... then why not contact me.
Regards
Jim Tuffin
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